Blog

How To Be A More Interesting Person

Ernest Hemmingway hunted German U-Boats in the Caribbean during WWII and Anthony Bourdain visited over 80 countries across all 7 continents. What have you done lately?

There’s no magic bullet to becoming a more interesting person. If you find yourself bored with life, others will find you boring as well. The key is to do remarkable things. Things that people want to talk about.

In plain English, to be an interesting person, we have to do interesting things.

Let’s take a look at how to be a more interesting person.


How to Be a More Interesting Person

Build Identity Capital

Identity Capital is a unique set of skills, experiences, personality traits, and talents. And it’s something you can build throughout the course of your life. The more Identity Capital you possess, the more interesting you’ll become.

Identity Capital is built by trying new things, lifelong learning, and honing your skills. These things combined turn into a personal mosaic. Something unique to you and you only.

Examples of Identity Capital

  • Knowledge — What is a subject you could speak about intelligently for hours on end? Perhaps you are a film buff or an amateur Civil War historian. Double down on your knowledge about these subjects. It will make you unique.
  • Skills — Special talents, trivia knowledge, foreign language skills, and anything else that exhibits competence. The more skills you have, the more Identity Capital you possess.
  • Experiences — What are some things have experienced that others likely have not? Gain more experiences and have more stories to tell.
  • Accomplishments — Degrees, certifications, awards, or special acknowledgments. What have you done that has been recognized by others? How can you do more?
  • Personality traits — What are your quirks and what are you eccentric about? Let these things shine through in your personality and the way you interact with the world. Some people won’t like them and that’s okay. You don’t have to be for everyone, however, there are people who will find them fascinating. Be authentic.

Possessing an abundance of Identity Capital makes you a well-rounded individual and the best part is, there is always room for more. Identity Capital is something we should continue working on for continued growth and personal fulfillment. Building Identity Capital is also a great way to create opportunities in your personal and professional life.

My advice is to make a list of the Identity Capital you currently have and come up with ways to add to it.

Create Mystery

Mystery is something that leaves people curious. And too many of us show our cards right from the get-go.

It’s best not to tell your life story to every person you meet. People tend to gravitate towards the quiet person in the room because they’re wondering what they have going on. People want to know what they’re thinking.

Speak clearly and concisely but hold back details about yourself. This technique especially works when things are going well for you. People are quite perceptive to others who are confident yet quiet.

The key point is, people are drawn to those who seem mysterious. Be aloof and make yourself scarce. People are curious about others who remain incomprehensible.

Develop a Personal Style

What comes to mind when you think of musicians like Kieth Richards, Stevie Nicks, and Elton John? The first thing is their personal style. Each of them has created a style that’s iconic and has withstood the test of time.

Now I’m not saying the average person should go to those extremes but, developing a personal style is a form of branding that can leave a lasting impression.

How we dress and present ourselves is important. When it comes to being more interesting there are little things we can do to stand out. By developing a personal style that is different from most people you will easily stand out in a crowd. Others will be curious about you and your unique look.

  • This could be a unique hairstyle, daring makeup, unusual shoes, piercings, tattoos, wearing the same outfit every day (like Steve Jobs), or an accessory native to a foreign country or one that has a story behind it.

Come up with a stand-out look to appear more interesting. One that has a timelessness to it. Create a personal style and wear it with confidence. Better yet, dress in a way that has an interesting story behind your choice of clothing and accessories.

Travel

Hop on a plane and see the world. Get down and dirty with the locals. Immerse yourself in other cultures. This is how you gain new experiences, cultivate your vision of the world, and gain new and fascinating stories to tell.

There is no better way to become a more interesting person than by traveling. According to studies, travel leads to changes in perspective, creativity, and personal and professional growth. And you don’t necessarily have to travel the world either. It could be your country or state, or your local surroundings. The point is to travel as far away as you can from your ‘personal bubble.’

By seeing things you have never seen before, eating foods you’ve never eaten before, and talking with people who have a unique view of the world you become a well-rounded person.

The best part about travel is it forces you out of your comfort zone. And by getting out of that zone you create more experiences while building Identity Capital.

Get a Life

What have you done lately? That was the question posed at the beginning of this piece. And if the answer is ‘nothing’ it is time to get off your ass.

Take a class, go out with friends, start a blog, seek adventure, or find some volunteer work. The point is to get moving. Luck is a function of surface area and it is up to you to spread out in your quest to build Identity Capital.

This doesn’t have to be extreme. If you can’t afford to travel the globe, don’t. But there are plenty of things you can do without leaving your city. You could read 1 new book per week for a year. That would be interesting. I don’t know anyone who has read 52 books in a year. Or you could visit 1 new restaurant per week and write a review about your dining experience on Twitter. Now you are showing the world you have some level of culinary expertise.

No matter what you decide, it’s important to do something. Live a life that leads to great stories. Then learn to tell those stories in a way that captivates people and keeps them interested.

Find Interesting Work

If you have a boring job you are probably a boring person. Work consumes one-third of our lives. And the best careers give us energy. They excite us. They give us a purpose and stories to share. Some of the most interesting people in the world are unique because they have found a way to make a living that is uncommon.

My advice is to find work that is not only meaningful but work you are passionate about. Quit your boring job.

And if you are not in a position to leave your job there are other things you can do. Start a side project like writing or photography. Or find a project working with others for a good cause.

Meaningful work is what gives us fire and excites us. It is part of a well-designed life. One that’s lived on purpose.

Make it your mission and occasionally spread the word.

Be the Exception to the Rule

We’ve all met that person whom we perceive in a certain way.

The tough-looking muscular guy who we discover is quite intelligent or the nerdy-looking girl that surprises us with her wild side. Being ‘the exception to the rule’ is an instant way to stand out and be unforgettable.

Quick Story

I used to own a towing company and I would often drive the trucks myself. Now we all know the stigma surrounding tow truck drivers. In the movies, they’re typically dumb, toothless, greasy, and looking to rip you off.

Imagine people’s surprise when I was clean-cut, well-spoken, and could hold an intelligent conversation. Looking back, it is funny. It wasn’t uncommon for people to ask me what I was doing driving a tow truck.

In their eyes, I was the exception to the rule.

***

Being the exception to the rule makes a person interesting and memorable. And when two parts of someone’s personality don’t fit together it creates an oddity that makes people curious about what that person is all about.

Stand out by emphasizing two opposing personality traits. You most likely already have them.


More Tips

  • Gain knowledge of local history.
  • Practice socializing to get better at it.
  • Know the local hotspots and best places to eat.
  • Don’t take things too seriously and have a ‘fun side’.
  • Spend time with interesting people.
  • Expand your vocabulary and refine the way you speak.
  • Consistently experiment with new routines.
  • Create a signature dish that only you know how to cook.

Final Note

Becoming an interesting person is really about living an interesting life.

Yes, there are a few tactics that can make someone seem more interesting on the outside but it takes actual work to be authentic.

There is no fake it til you make it if you truly want to be a more interesting person.

Thanks for reading. I hope you found value in this post.

Final note: If you haven’t done so already, sign up for my emails. Get the Sunday Notes newsletter and new post alerts in your inbox. You can do so here.