This is a short post and not the typical article I write. Usually, my posts are neat and clean with actionable tips on how to do A or how to achieve B with neat bullet points and helpful links. I’ll get back to those sort of posts soon but today I’ve decided to bitch.
This piece is a rant, or it could be considered an opinion piece on opinions — whichever you see fit. You see, as of late, I’ve been inundated with opinions. Opinions from loved ones and friends that have no vested interest in what the hell it is I’m actually doing with my life.
Opinions on my business, raising my child, and my overall lifestyle. The worst part of these unsolicited pieces of non-contextual bullshit is that they are from people who have achieved very little. People who have never had the balls to do anything ‘out of the norm’ with their lives, yet wish to tell me how to run mine.
It’s my rule or preference that if someone’s worthy of giving their opinion they should have some qualifications. A certain degree of expertise or success. Actual knowledge of the subject they are speaking about is required for me to entertain the idea of giving a shit about what they have to say.
Unfortunately, most unsolicited advice comes from people who have their very large heads up their asses and can barely manage their own lives.
So, to those who have decided to run their cake-holes in the name of worry, concern, or the thinking that ‘they know best’ — on behalf of myself and readers in agreement, we collectively wish you a giant — f*uck you.
Let’s move on.
The Problem With Opinions
“Opinions are like assholes, everybody’s got one.” — Confucius [probably]
I’m sure I have cited this quote incorrectly but the goal of this post is not to be overly accurate with fancy quotes and obscure statistics. I simply don’t care.
The problem with opinions is most people aren’t qualified to give them. And although that can be a problem in itself, one opinion isn’t generally enough to make good decisions.
I’ll explain.
Focus Group of One
The problem with receiving the opinion of a friend or family member is that there is usually only one of them. One opinion from one person.
I call this a focus group of one.
When large companies decide to launch a new product or a new advertising campaign they hire a focus group. A large group of people paid to collectively give their opinion. Then, they take all opinions into account, in order to decide in which direction to move.
Relying on one opinion is a poor decision-making system. This is why big companies use large focus groups. This is also why they rely on a board of directors. A collective group of people interested in the health of the company.
A focus group of one [or two for the record] is not very valuable. In fact, if the person giving the advice doesn’t have a vested interest in your choices it’s all but entirely useless.
If your friend Bob says you should leave your wife for that cute 25-year-old blonde in accounting he’s not going to care when your soon-to-be ex-wife takes you to the cleaners. He’s not going to care when the blonde realizes you are a broke loser, and he’s not going to care when you’re living in your sister’s basement, eating Ramen Noodles, jerking off, and feeling slightly suicidal.
Don’t listen to Bob. He doesn’t have a vested interest.
So there’s that.
A lone opinion from one idiot isn’t enough. More importantly, a lone opinion from an idiot who has no vested interest in the outcome of your choices spells disaster.
If someone is giving you advice on your business or career or anything else for that matter, and they are not dependent on you to put food on the table — who gives a shit what they have to say.
Politely ask them to shut their fat orifice. The end.
Armchair Life Coaches
The next issue we run into is the type of people who have no idea what the hell they are talking about. These are the people who have no credentials and a proven track record of shitty and questionable life choices. Somehow, albeit, I’ll never know how, these people are confident that they are the right person to counsel you.
At best, they will nudge you into living a shitty boring average life — like theirs. A life they think everyone should live — especially you.
At worst, they will guide you down a path they have never walked [nor had the guts to] and shrug their shoulders when you end up in emotional ruins after following their crappy advice.
These people are the worst.
They have never run a business but tell you how to run yours. They have never held down a job but give you career advice. They’re awful at parenting yet tell you how to raise your child(ren). These are the people who have had multiple rotten miserable marriages but think they’re qualified to give you relationship advice.
These people are know-nothing busybodies. They are nosy, self-serving, and have grandiose delusions about themselves, and what they have achieved.
To be honest, I’d love to say to people like this: “What the hell do you know?” or “Why should I listen to you?”
The point is, when receiving advice, it’s best to question the source.
In most cases, the person giving his or her unsolicited opinion is not qualified to do so.
Your best bet is to kindly tell them to shut the hell up.
Final Thoughts
I won’t go much further into this rant as I’d be wasting my time and yours and admittedly I’m not sure where I was going with this anyway, but, here’s my opinion on opinions.
Seeking advice from well-qualified and trusted sources is always a good idea. It’s best to keep a trusted circle of advisors for life’s tough choices.
On the other hand, unsolicited opinions from blowhards should be ignored. On occasion these do-gooders are right and you have to humbly accept that fact. But, in most cases, it’s an annoying experience to get advice from someone who has no investment in the quality of your life — or happiness — without proper context.
These are people with a warped sense of self-importance who are arrogant enough to think that they have some sort of weight in our decision-making process.
It’s best to ignore these imbeciles and stick to the opinions of people you trust. People with relevant experience. More importantly, it’s imperative to listen to our gut and inner voice.
Of course, what do I know? — this is just my opinion.
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